We spend a significant proportion of our lives at work. If you work between 9am to 6pm five days a week, you’ll spend over one third of your life at work.
Take 20 seconds now to think of what factors make your day at work a happy or sad one?
What do you come up with? Is it stuff related to how good you were at your job? Was it how well you got on with the other people you work with and how much fun you had?
You might it’s a combination of things, which is true, but when you really rattle down what made your last great day so good or your last terrible day so bad, it almost always involves the nature of your interactions with other people.
You happiness at work is hugely affected by the quality of your interactions and your success tends to be closely related to this as well. If you struggle to get on with the people you work with, you won’t have a good time at work, regardless of how interested or driven you are by the work itself. Conversely, if you have a really mundane job but having a blast with colleagues, you’ll likely return home happy and energised.
In my blog I’m going to talk about techniques to optimise your relationships with your colleagues and bosses.
There aren’t many areas in which social skills are more central to success than in dating relationships. Your ability to develop and maintain close connections with girls or guys you’re interested in rests almost entirely with the way you present yourself, interact and demonstrate your personality. By this I’m talking self image, confidence, charisma, humour and authenticity. Being comfortable in your own skin and the ability to spark interest and form rapport in the basis of this and incase you hadn’t noticed, this is ALL down to interpersonal skills. Your looks may play a part, sire but the importance of this is usually exaggerated in the minds of most people as a factor for why they don’t achieve the level of success they want in relationships. If you’re not achieving in this area, the problem will be with your social abilities and NOT with your looks, your financial situation or your job. Now I don’t want to make this a dating advice blog (partly as I’m not the right person for this and also there are lots of other information sources out there that’ll be much better in advising you in this specific area of life) but it’s hard to avoid the impact that improving your social skills will have in this arena of life, so I’ll probably touch upon it from time to time. As you become more fearless and charismatic you’ll start to notice an improvement with the interactions you have with the opposite (or same for that matter) sex
This category may seem obvious. Specifically though, I’d like to tell you just how far you can take things when you really master your skills. Having the ability to create multiple awesome social circles quickly and from scratch means you’ll never be stuck wanting to get out the house and meet up with people but having nothing to do. You’ll have a list of options to choose from and will have the high quality problem of having to pick between them. Of course, you can choose to do nothing and chill at home with a movie, but the point is that if you choose to do so, that will be your active choice and not one made for you due to lack of options. That’s what this whole blog is about….giving you the option to CHOOSE how you live your life.
Confidence and Self Esteem
I can’t state the impact of that having good social skills has on your sense of self-worth and value. These are aspects of your personality that pervade your entire being…how your talk, carry yourself and your sense of entitlement to reaching towards your goals and achieving your desires. Going down the journey of improving your social abilities, you’ll grow in confidence, feel comfortable just being yourself in front of others and develop your own charm (or charisma if you like). You’ll see the world differently. You won’t be scared of being made to feel a certain way by certain situations or getting upset by other people. You’ll care less about what other people think of you and your happiness and sense of self worth will come from within yourself rather than being influenced by your environment and those around you. You might find you become more ‘polarising’, but which I mean that instead of everyone thinking you’re ‘quite nice’, some people may really dislike you and some people will absolutely love you, though by that stage you may feel indifferent to those who don’t resonate with your personality. Your state of mind will be depend entirely on your opinion of yourself and not on anyone or anything else. Imagine going through life being completely carefree about what people think of you. You’ll feel pretty liberated to do and be whatever you want. You’ll finally just be able to BE YOURSELF. This is living with authenticity, because you’ll finally feel free to let your inner thoughts, opinions and personality shine through without fear of judgement. This is where the magic begins because the effect you have on people around while in this state is pretty powerful. I think of this as ’roundedness’ or ‘centeredness’ and it’s an incredibly powerful mindset to have. People who are grounded tend to exert a charm on other people that is somewhat magnetic and mysterious and tends to attract other people’s curiosity. I’ll be talking more about this in a separate post in roundedness where I aim to discuss techniques on how to develop it.
See you soon!